Another Super-Bowl Sunday comes and goes..

The morning of February 5, 2006 my team the Seattle Seahawks were preparing for their very first Super Bowl Sunday game as I prepared for my first hosting of my teams visit to the big games by throwing a party at my home.

Before the game could even start, as I hurried around preparing for the Big Day my phone rings. My Dad calls to say “Good Luck Today” “I’ll be routing for your Seahawks” we chatted and I said, got to go Dad. Still lots to do. Less then a hour after I hung up the phone, the phone rings again and the words uttered at the other end of that line dropped me to my knees. My dad was found dead when they went looking for him because he didn’t return from a walk he ventured out on with his dog.

As people showed for the party my husband shared the news and people graciously left as I sat by myself in tears for the better part of the day. Several

Super Bowls past before I even watched again as it was a reminder of all I put off that now could never transpire.

The one day I realized if it weren’t for the Seahawks making it to the Big Game on that very day, I wouldn’t even have had the opportunity to share the conversation we had that Morning. So looking at the glass half full, I was blessed to at least have that.

So I’m back to watching the big game but it’s still a reminder of all that was lost. A reminder that tomorrow is not promised. That putting off until tomorrow what should be done today is a risk that sometimes can’t be undone.

If you were here today Dad, I’d call you to say, Rhonda is better today then I’ve heard her be ever in my adult life. I know you always worried that she’d never find a path to some sort of wellness.

I’d call to say I love you, just because..

So if you love someone make sure you let them know. If you need to be someplace, get there.. because putting it off could very well mean it will never happen.

Growing up Broken..

There has just been a few times in my life I’ve opened up publicly about all I’ve been through. All I’ve walked away from and all I’ve turned my back on. I never look back or use the past as a crutch. I always keep moving forward. I don’t dwell on all I’ve been though even though at times I have to push it back down when the pain from the past starts to creep out of my inner soul.

Sometimes there seems to be no reason for the memories that cause the anxiety to shows it’s painful way to the surface and other times people whom chose to not put the abusive and violent ways behind them try to come at you and in some ways as if to try to guilt me into their failures or lack of strength to walk away like I did. They treat me like I was given a “break” to make it out of the viscous cycle I was born into.

The only break I got was a broken back.. literally.. No one handed me anything, not even a reached out hand.. I made the choice to find the path that took me out of that past I have worked so hard to put behind me.When I think about it though I have to give credit to one event. A event that shaped the beginning of the process of me changing and choosing a different path. It was the Day I saw Jesus. I know. You think I’m crazy. It was a day Like so many others.. fighting, yelling, beating in a trailer we lived in that was 10 ft wide maybe. The bedrooms very small. A twin bed along one wall that took up almost the entire width of the room, but there was just enough for my little body at 11 years old to fit between the wall and the end of the bed. I hid there repeating to myself ” I don’t want this life. God please help me” I remember saying it over and over and then I heard a mans voice speaking softly but firmly “This is not the life you have to have” I heard him say “I will always be by your side if you always hear me I will Lead you out” looking up from the corner of the floor where I was hiding, towards the door, I saw a light in the shape of a man.. I remember sitting there and a peaceful calm came over me. It was from that moment I knew to listen intently and I will find my way out. And that has been what I have done. For nearly 42 years now that’s been my roadmap. I talk to him daily and many times I get caught. People say, are you talking to yourself and I just say yes. But I know I’m talking to him. And I know he listens.

Years can go by and all is good and then something comes up that brings it all back.

Then I’m trapped in this spiral of feelings .. yes it’s family, but it’s family that if I stayed anywhere near them, their addictions, abusive behaviors and unlawful activities would have drug me down with them. Multiple prison terms for many of them, years and years and years of drug abuse and drug trafficking, prostitution for some has caught up to them. One in the Hospital tetoring at deaths door, another one homeless but still choosing to use and abuse .. and somehow it comes back to me as “My Fault” or “My Responsibility” to make life better for them, yet never, not once did they ever set out to make a better life for themselves.

What I needed today as I woke up to this was the day God provided for me. A day with what I know is most important. A day that is hard to make happen as my kids are adults. But today out of know where it came together and it was so needed. A reminder to me why I took the path I took. The path that led me to a loving husband and two beautiful kids that love their family. Kids that unlike me never saw the ugliness I saw as a child.

I stopped the cycle of abuse. I broke the odds. Today was a reminder to me that I did the right thing. And I’m not done. God put me on this path of strong and virtuous life to change this World where I can and I know I’m not done.

Tonight I’ll go to bed thankful for today and prayful for tomorrow. To know what direction or path to take as one life could be coming to a end. I pray that somehow God has been on the same path with them too.

If your out there and you think you want to break the cycle of abuse. Please trust God and find your strength to do it for you and for those you can bring into this world because you did.

Once Abused.. Can’t just Look the other way..

Once again, another sleepless night. Seems to be happening more frequently again..

You see, the way I can understand it for me is when you’ve endured abuse and live through it and gotten out of it, like I have because I fought back and I chose a different path. At a very young age I made that decision that it wasn’t going to define me.. and I won that battle, but where I struggle is seeing it all around me.. Abuse, it takes on so many roles: emotional, verbal, sexual, financial, elder, power.. I’m that person who will speak up and speak out all the time, the disheartening and let’s say exhausting part is watching so many Just Look the other way as if it’s becoming the Normalcy in the world we live in today.

Have we become that nation that so many will take the time to record the abuse rather then step in and stop it.

How many times have I heard, “it’s none of our business” or “it’s not your place” when in Turn I’m saying “It’s not right” or “what if that was you, wouldn’t you want help?”

So for social acceptance am I just supposed to sit down now and except that this is the way it is? If only just one person could feel in my heart and see in my head what I feel and see, I wouldn’t feel so alone..

Somewhere out there someplace there is someone that gets what I’m saying. Someone that is going through what I’m going through. Someone, Someplace, Somewhere… I know I’m not alone in this battle.

“Gaurded Girl”

This morning in a conversation with a friend she said to me, “Your a Guarded Girl” and please know this to me is not a insult. In fact it’s a reassurance that yes, some of my friends do get who I am and appreciate the fact that with them they’ve found a place in my heart that allowed me to “Let Down My Guard” atleast with that particular person. 

My “Tight Circle” is small and I’m ok with that but it made me think this morning as I sit in my car, Is it small because I’m guarded or is it because some people take no effort to really know who people really are. This thought came to mind because of the person that had a heart to heart talk with me today. A pep talk you could call it. She has known me a shorter amount of time then most of the people around me but yet had me so figured out and loves me for it and who I am. I had to ask myself that question. Why is it so apparent to some yet not to others and the only answer I could find is some people just don’t see anything past what’s on the surface yet others have the special gift to see beyond that. I feel I’m that person too. Someone that looks at someone but sees things others don’t. So is it because people like me have been through so much as our character was being molded that it gave us a ability to see things that are more then skin deep. 

Just thinking out loud (sitting in my car waiting on a appraiser leaves plenty of time to think) 

For those that know me and have taken the time to truly know and understand me I’m forever Greatful for them in my life. They know who they are ❤ for those that are to thin skinned themselves to look deeper, don’t need them anyway. Life is short, love those that love you back, walk away from those that don’t take the time to learn with you.. 

Jack of All Trades, Master of None..

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We have all heard this “Jack of All Trades, Master of None”  but what does that really mean in your life.. I sit here shaking my head as I have seen so many people jump from one trade in the same field to another.. and the only reason is the last trade wasn’t easy enough.. Or they were not finding the success or income if you may at the previous field.. I am going to use a harsh but true example.. In the real estate industry I am a Broker that does sales.. buyers and sellers and it is what I always did.. Did the rug get pulled out from under me.. Yes it did as it did with so many others.. Did I add another stream of income.. Absolutely.. something I could do while I was pushing through the economic downturn in the housing market.. What I didn’t do is switch it up in the Real Estate Industry.. I know what I do, and I do it well.. I pushed through.. I didn’t switch to lending, appraising, underwriting.. it’s not what I do.. I did get into networking.. Which in turn brought me clients on the real estate side.. In the bigger picture.. it really is the same skill.. Meet potential clients, put them in “Funnel”  Add heartfelt value to them as you can, and one day they will refer you, hire you or join you ❤

I sit here and see people that post all over social media about how their lives suck, yet one day they are going one direction and the next they are the exact opposite direction.. It’s like a carnival ride.. Find a Path and stay the course.. Tyler Perry did a Video last year that really stuck with me..

Now that being said.. I did make some changes on my path 7 months ago.. Although I didn’t change my beliefs, or my industries.. I partnered with different people.. doing the same thing I am good at..  People make a huge difference in your success as far as keeping you motivated to do what you do every day.. You have to love where you are to do what you do successfully.. you also have to be committed to the work that is involved..

Decide what you truly want.. Be a scholar of that industry.. there is more to a TITLE then a name tag.. get the knowledge that you need to be credible at what it is you want to become and stay with that course..  Lead by example.. Treat others how you would want to be treated and Love and Trust in GOD.. That is my secret to SUCCESS.

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If you would like more information on Networking or Real Estate.. Fill out the form below.. I would love to talk with you..

Is it just me.. Or does anyone else miss the good old days?

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I am sitting here and thinking about how over stimulated everyone has become. Social media this and that. Groups to share information. Everything, even if it is perfectly innocent becomes something to talk about. Just because it is posted people perceive it to be true. It seems as if a simple post can be taken out of context to the point of becoming dangerous to the person it is posted about.

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Ok.. This will seriously date me as I remember the days when the phone was at your home, office or corner phone booth. I remember getting my first cell phone (yes, it was the size of a brick) and being so excited about having it. And now I appreciated a little time this past holiday when I had no signal and believe me I feel guilty saying that because it is always with me. I laughed when I remembered that if we just didn’t want to talk to anyone we took the phone off the hook. Hilarious to think of that now as that is not even possible. If I told my kids to take the phone off the hook, they would look at me like I was nuts!

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Then there is Social Media, and please know I love Social Media. I love it to share knowledge, cute photos of kids and pets, motivation but (and this is just my opinion) playing out play by play of ones life in every specific detail, locations, how one grooms them self.. Who they hate.. ( I believe positive in public, negative in private ) some people seem to have lost the sense of boundaries. Back in the day one would never get on stage in front of the largest football stadium and tell the audience they hate their neighbor, blurt out their gross behavior and etc etc etc, but some seem to have no problem telling a audience of who knows how many via twitter every detail.. Play by play. Now, sharing funny behaviors of your significant other is a wife’s right ツ lol. Yes that is social media abbreviation. A good friend once said that means “Lots of Love”

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There are so many amazing things about how all this over stimulation has changed our lives and how we do business. The target market if you have a product and service in your business is reached via social media on such a grander scale. The bang for your buck has a much larger reach. Millions have been made by those who become a student of the internet and apply all they can learn.

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And last but not least, if the technology is used properly today it can actual give you more quality time out doing the things you love because your office is wherever you are.. My iPad and iPhone is the most valuable possession I have ever purchased to use in my business. My office can be wherever I need it to be. Now that being said, I believe a vacation should be a vacation but since technology has allowed us to be more portable why not change your office view when you can.

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So although I miss the simple days at times, I will be the first to confess I would be lost without all the technology advances I have at my fingertips today.
Example.. I just wrote this blog from my iPhone. I love my iPhone ツ

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Taking a Negative and Making it a Positive..

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I came a crossed this video on my Facebook feed this morning and it really made me think.. As a Child growing up I did not have the childhood experiences that most have.. but it is something I never talk about.. It has always amazed me when I hear people blaming their past for their present.. it actually quietly infuriates me.. Why, Because at a very young age I realized with what I credit God for, showing me that “I can be the change I want to see in my life..” I can break the cycle, the circle, what ever the Buzz word in Psychology today is.. I was about 11 years old.. From the moment  I had that message delivered to me in a spiritual way as I sit in the corner of my bedroom crying in fear I knew “I had to be the Change” The message that came to me in a bright light was just what Aurora said in this video..”Take the negatives and make them positive” “You don’t have to have this life”

As I look back and think of how things have evolved it takes a lot to just really think about what could have been..Those memories are buried deep within and I just don’t like to think about it.. but when I think of the other possible outcome and I have a vivid picture of what could have been and I will explain that later.. It is a sad reminder that all though over the past few years things changed directions on me, Economy driven mostly.. I sit here almost angry that I am not where I wanted to be.. but I need to remember how far I have come.. and embrace that.. Even in this economic downturn there is a positive.. I am meeting new people whom I already adore.. I am learning new things and this path very well could take us to a whole new level that could never have happened without this change.. Take the Negatives and Make them Positives..

Now for the people out there that are wondering about, Was it really that bad.. Think of it this way.. I have one sister whom I was raised with.. She is 15 months older.. She had her first child at 15, Was in Prostitution by the age of 18. Dropped of school at 15, Drugs, 2 more kids that she never raised as the state took them from her..spent most of her adult life in jail and prison and now she is on permanent disability living on merely Govt. help.. Choices.. The only difference.. I chose a different path..And believe me when I say that for years I tried to pull her up with me..she just had no desire to be better..  As far as my mother whom no matter what ” she did the best she could “. She found the love of her life on marriage # 14.. You got to hand it to her for never giving up.. It was not what she did that caused so much damage to us girls.. It was what she allowed the men she was with to do to her girls that caused the damage..

All I can say to the people out there that might be struggling.. Fight through it and be the example of change.. Only you can make that difference.. thank you Aurora for making me remember.. and giving me the courage to at least tell part of my story.. As this is more than I have ever told.. You are my blessing today..

God Bless